Allowing Arrogance to Show Its Pearl
A Contemplation of the 31st Gene Key
Congratulations! The headline talks about arrogance but you keep reading. The major defense system of arrogance against its detection is telling you that you’re not arrogant and that this doesn’t concern you. It takes a highly developed willingness to look at your bullshit to continue reading a text about arrogance.
Let me share some core facts about arrogance before we dive deeper. Arrogance is an emotion but also a physiological pattern in your body. Like every emotion it serves a purpose, in this case, it serves as a red flag to indicate that your assessment of abilities of yourself or someone else is off. Like every physiological pattern, arrogance feels a certain way in your body.
Unfortunately, arrogance has its defense mechanisms also. If your ego still has a great pull on you, arrogance will throw smoke grenades so you cannot see it. This pattern usually works like this: you look into the mirror, see yourself and your arrogance tells you what you want to see. Arrogance is always allied and almost merged with your ego and shows you the exact image your ego is expecting. Arrogance is so hard to see because it always matches your self-image exactly and is invisible to people who are not able to question their self-perception.
But if you look closer; if you try to see yourself exactly as you are, you will understand that it is not you you are seeing, it is someone else. Arrogance is creating images of yourself and others that do not align with reality. Thus arrogance is really harmful. If your self-image is too big or your image of others is too small, you will always sit in the wrong chairs and you will always assign others and yourself to the wrong tasks.
Recently I discovered how my arrogance came into my world. I was emotionally abandoned by my family which made it hard for me to connect with my peers on an emotional level. I was always a little “weird” and had to struggle to be invited to birthday parties for example. In other words, I felt lonely for almost all my childhood. To feel lonely sucks so I invented the story of my superiority to explain to myself why I was lonely. That way, I was still lonely but it felt better to be lonely by choice.
Additionally, my personal shadow of arrogance is reinforced by a cultural imprint of arrogance. We live in a capitalistic society that is built on competition. To win the materialistic rat race, it is a competitive advantage to present yourself as superior, and the best way to present yourself as superhuman and better than everyone else is to believe it.
This need to feel superior is born in fear of others. If you believe that you need to be better than others to achieve a safe existence in our society, it is pure logic to also believe that your existence is threatened if you are inferior. Arrogance is a desperate attempt to create security for our existence but it misses the fact that materialistic achievements can never give you true security. You can only feel completely held like you were in your mother’s womb by feeling safe in your body and by connecting with other individuals who have found the same sense of safety.
If we try to look at our relationships and careers from the perspective of competition, we disconnect ourselves from true oneness. We create a cheap copy of safety by living in huge houses and having full bank accounts. But instead of creating safety for ourselves we accidentally kick ourselves out of the Garden Eden we live in already. Heaven and hell are no distant places. They exist right here. They are two different dimensions of reality and the key to both lies in your attitude towards the world.
This is what makes arrogance such a sad state of existence. The arrogant person is like the only person standing in the corner of the dance floor. Sulkingly, we observe everyone having fun while we are convincing ourselves that dancing is stupid and that everyone doing it is stupid. The result is that we are sad, miserable, and disconnected. Unfortunately, arrogance doesn’t allow us to see that. Arrogance only notices how seemingly safe it is to stand in that corner. What counts for the arrogant version of us is that no one will make fun of us or steal our backpacks while we are dancing if we stay “safe”.
It is hard to get rid of the shadow of arrogance. True, it only gives us a cheap copy of safety. But for someone who has never experienced true safety that means the world. It even lets us forget that what we truly want from life is joy, pleasure, and laughter.
As always, we should have compassion for arrogance. Compassion is also the best way to heal a person stuck in arrogance. While it is possible to leave most shadows on your own by looking into the dark corners of your psyche, this is incredibly hard for someone stuck in arrogance. First of all, arrogance is so hard to see as we discussed before. Additionally, for a person in fear, even fake safety is incredibly valuable since it is one of the few positive emotions they have conscious access to.
By being compassionate you can make that person feel safe. By sending the warmth of your heart to such a person you can spark a fire in their heart. You can help that person to discover the gifts of arrogance. Like all shadows, arrogance hides a pearl inside. In a state of arrogance, we overestimate our abilities to win the rat race. Sometimes we also pretend the opposite to gain an advantage - false humility is the sister of arrogance and even harder to detect than its brother.
But if you can catch yourself being arrogant, you have discovered a very helpful indicator that will improve your self-assessment big time. As soon as you notice the fog of arrogance, you can ask yourself: “Where am I overestimating myself? Where am I underestimating myself?” And after the fog of arrogance has left you will now see your abilities with great clarity.
To detect arrogance is easy if you are willing. The only thing you need to do is wait. After a while arrogance shows itself as a sensation in your body if you pay attention. It is a different sensation for everyone and to detect your specific sensations of arrogance you can go back in time to a situation where you know you have been arrogant. Try to remember that sensation. And if you think there is no such situation because you are not arrogant then just wait 10 minutes for your sensation of arrogance to kick in because you are arrogant right now.
Once you have learned to harness the gifts of arrogance, you can assess other people’s skills with amazing accuracy. If you have no clue about your abilities how should you ever be able to see someone else’s abilities? But the moment you can do that with yourself you will also be able to do that with others. Some of you might start to see why the shadow of arrogance gives birth to the gift of leadership (31st Gene Key).
Overcoming your arrogance can make you a very gifted leader. You will easily put everyone on your team in a position where this person can unleash their full potential. You will have an X-ray for skills and abilities and will do everything in your power to unblock and unleash that potential. A true leader doesn’t tell people what to do, a true leader shows people what they are capable of.
if you are interested even more in the dynamics of arrogance here is a channeled transmission of my soul tribe about this topic. don’t miss it!
for further reading, I recommend this post of mine about denial. just as arrogance, denial is a strong force that keeps you locked in your egoic mind but can also reveal great personal potential:
